Some oddities I came across, just looking behind my couch.
- Business cards from Canadian strip joints and other sex services, circa 1993. Some time in the early or mid 90s I went to Canada with my family. At some restaurant I saw these cards so I took some of them. I know they were from this Canada trip and not any of the later ones, because they were mixed in with circa-1989 Batman cards and a long since dried and rotted rubber band. Another amusing thing about that Canada trip: being 18 but still a non-drinker (I was a complete teetotaler by entire life, up until around age 28) I was old enough to buy beer at Expos stadium. Which of course came at the request of my younger brother, who drank them. It was certainly odd hearing the Canadian national anthem AFTER the American national anthem at a game. Anyway, I threw the cards out. After my last time in Canada, I've developed a hatred for all things French anyway. (Yet for the record, I am ethnically French-Canadian.)
- Money House Blessing Offering Spray. Picked this up at Spencer Gifts, probably in 1989. It was the only one in the store, and I've never seen another can since. I've always been conservative with it, so there's surprisingly still a lot left. It has a fruity smell to it, somewhere in between fruity candles and grape soda. Note the disclaimer at the end of the directions.
- Denis Waitley on The Psychology of Winning (cassette tape). I think my dad got this for free somewhere. And no, my dad wouldn't have given it to me saying "Billy, you're a loser. Listen to this." He probably just threw it in with the rest of the family's tape collection and somehow I ended up with it. I'll add this to the New-Age tapes I've been selling on eBay.
- Clay Veggies flyer & ticket. Ah yes, my first real live band performance. I was a junior in high school. I hooked up with a great guitarist named Barry Munsterteiger, who somehow put up with my enormous musical ego at the time. We managed to get a drummer at the last minute (B.J., who was Sanesthesia's percussionist) and a singer named Jim.
- Hat from some training class. I got this ridiculous waste of fabric at a software company I worked for, about 10 years ago. It was from some training class for one of our products. I don't even remember what it was or what it did, or if we even kept the same name for it after 6 months. These hidious things did decorate many a cubicle at the time. Who in their right mind would wear such a thing? Maybe I should take this and the other most ridiculous why-do-I-still-have-these clothes I can find in my place, and take a photo of myself wearing them all.
- Iron Maiden, "The Trooper" statue. Great statue! I love Iron Maiden. And I got a great deal on this when I bought it at Spencer Gifts several years back. Too bad I never had the room to display it somewhere.
- A small red metal pail of Bonkers tickets. Bonkers is a local Chuck E. Cheese sort of place. I still like playing 80s video games and games like skeeball. Unfortunately, if a creepy looking 30-something year old guy like me went to a place like this, I'd be suspected of being a pedophile.
- The Scream - inflatible sculpture. Knowing that I loved the original painting so much, my brother got this for my 18th birthday. And honestly, I thought it was a great gift, and I still do. It sure got a lot of positive comments in the dorm room and fraternity house. Though one not-so-bright woman I was fooling around with at the time said "Dude, what is that? An inflatible fuck doll?" I'm sure that mostly was her alcohol talking. Though what I found most amusing about it was the disclaimer to not use this as a safety flotation device. Could you imagine being on a ship where somebody was overboard, drowning, and you ran below deck to come back with this and yell "Here, catch this!"